That, at long last, someone truly saw them, loved and appreciated them.That’s the emotional stake from which it is so very difficult for many targets of narcissistic abuse to divest.
You’re not the asshole because you discovered their betrayal.Mirroring your good qualities in the beginning of the relationship further serves to strengthen your projection of positive qualities onto them. The result is you doubt your perceptions, memory and intuition.Like a Jedi mind trick, the narcissist or psychopath will look you straight in the eye and tell you, “I’m a good person,” while exploiting you financially, taking you for granted, smearing you to friends and family and cheating on you.Tools to get them what they want at any given moment. Gaslighting is a form of lying, but an especially crazy-making one.They mirror your good qualities back to you and you believe them. The narcissist, borderline and psychopath will deny having said and done things you you heard them say and do.